We all have relationships – with our families, our friends, our intimate love partners, our work colleagues, our neighbors. Oftentimes our relationships are a struggle. Relationships can be among the most rewarding things in life. They can also be challenging and heart wrenching.

Common Issues in Relationships:

  • Feeling blamed and judged
  • Loneliness…feeling that you are growing apart
  • Addiction
  • Codependency
  • Feeling like you have the same argument over and over again
  • Feel like you are doing more of the emotional work

While tempting to blame everything that goes wrong on the other person, it usually “takes two to tango.” We bring our own issues to our relationships. And if we never sort through the dynamics that get in the way of our having a healthy relationship, we keep running into the same problems over and over again…and drag the same baggage from one relationship to the next.

We tend to function in relationships based on what we learned from our parents. We may deliberately choose people who seem completely different from those who have caused us difficulties and pain in the past, only to discover that the very same dynamics are at play. And few of us can sort through and resolve these issues on our own. They tend to be too complicated and deeply ingrained to be clearly evident to us. We usually need someone with an outside perspective to help us recognize the patterns in what we do and find alternative ways to handle things.

Working with a therapist to dig into what drives you to choose the people you have chosen and understand what you are doing to contribute to relationship difficulties can help you make different and wiser choices. Then you can make changes to how you show up in your current relationships and pursue healthy ones that feed your soul.

I have 25 years of experience in helping people understand and change the way they function in their relationships. If you are struggling with yours, please contact me for help.

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